If you know me well, you know I’m a greaaaaaat mulitasker. It’s second nature for me to hold meaningful conversations with two separate people, while balancing my checkbook, cooking dinner and French braiding my own hair.
Well, today I had a great idea: I’ll pick up the boys from school, take a bike ride and “walk” Clementine. All at the same time. Impressive, I know. I was kicking myself for not bringing my phone along to document this for you but then I remembered how great I was at this juggling thing and thought operating the camera function on my phone might have pushed this whole situation over the edge a bit.
At first, I was mentally patting myself on the back because I was so skilled. Every few seconds, I would tell her what a good dog she was being. With each encouragement, she would quicken her pace. She responds beautifully to positive reinforcement. At one point, I wasn’t even pedaling. Apparently, English Bulldogs can double as sled dogs. I always knew I liked her.
Then we slid passed a yard with a dog and she darted over to introduce herself. She pulled one way and my bike stayed in its current progression. Luckily nobody was around to witness my graceful tumble from the bike. Not even the lady that normally creeps up silently behind me like a panther in her golf cart.
I recovered, got back on the bike and kept positively reinforcing the dog’s behavior. Strangely enough, she didn’t have as much energy and was trotting along right next to me. I had to actually pedal again. What’s the point of this multitasking?
We finally got to the school, waited in the shade for the boys and got some of our energy back. I guess it wasn’t enough of a rest because as we followed the boys on the trail home, she had this longing in her eyes. Where are we going now? I thought we were at the intended destination! I thought you loved me. She dutifully padded beside the bike. I slowed down a bit to give her a break and to let golf cart panther pass me.
Eventually I was barely moving forward and the leash was pulling her along. We moved at a snail’s pace the entire way and the boys had to keep stopping to wait for us. The positive reinforcements weren’t working anymore. She didn’t care for my approval. Apparently English Bulldogs double as sleds.
In other news: the boys got home safe from school, I took a nice meandering bike ride and Clementine doesn’t have any more energy to scoot her butt on the carpet or hump guests who come over.
I have a made a conclusion. I’m great at tasking. This multi thing is for the birds, or dogs, or whatever.